Following my failed attempt to leave my mother in Ireland (see previous post), my sister and I were discussing where else we could send her. Maybe Florida. Lots of old people live in Florida. There's a beach. There's no snow.
More importantly, there's no me!
There are, however, TONS of crocodiles in Florida!
Do you know what creature is higher in the food chain than a crocodile? What makes a crocodile swim away shivering in his boots? There's only one creature that inspire fear in the cold heart of a crocodile
Skeletor.
Charmaine and I agreed that we could potentially be paid a great deal of money to send Skeletor to Florida. She could single-handedly stop the ploriferation of crocodiles in Florida without using any traditional weapons.
After minimal exposure to Skeletor, the crocs will lose all of their self-esteem. They will believe that they are too fat and will become anorexic (which is good for the 2-year old unsupervised children playing around the swamps).
It's a win/win!
Does anyone have Florida's phone number?
4 comments:
Ummm... My mom lives in Florida and there are plenty of alligators in her neighborhood to test your theory. My grandma also lives there and is senile (mostly). I bet she could keep Skeletor company...
If your grandma doesn't mind accepting the fact that the world revolves around Skeletor, then it'll work :)
There are no crocs in florida, except the one's on people's feet...they are ALLIGATORS....my mom lives there too, but the alligators have been trained to skirt her street and usual route....but Briana, my mom would give skeletor a run for her money re: the center of the unviverse thng. I stronnly recommend the Baja Peninsula. There is no airport there, so you could drive her down...and leave her....
You guys are awfully particular about crocodiles vs. alligators! I can't tell the difference and I'm pretty sure Skeletor can't either. She tops the food chain either way:)
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